audience: emma perkins

[cyclists]

Comments

[cyclists]

Okay, see, there we go. I think there's also a little leeway for your work as a Nova, too, and considering what happened on Tuesday and the information you got you've earned it.

Tell me three secrets that aren't easy to talk about, and I'll see what I can do. [Is he hoping this works? Yeah.]

[foodbin]

...Can I just say them, or do I have to elaborate on them afterwards?

[cyclists]

Elaboration. This has to be something of equal exchange, remember? [i.e. it also has to be cleared by Dana but she's asleep but Sol would try anyway.]

[foodbin]

Okay. Okay, something I wouldn't ordinarily talk about...

[She pauses for a second.]

To start, I... don't think I ever want to go back to my home after this. I'm scared of the feelings I have for someone here, and I think Naminé deserves a better partner than me. [...] I guess you should tell me how I should expand on that.

[cyclists]

[...hm.]

Are these three different things or all they tied into one thing and then you have to say two more?

[foodbin]

No, those are three separate things. Unless they don't count as separate for some reason...?

[cyclists]

I think they're probably separate. [God please don't let him down, universe.] ...let's start with the first one. Is it just because of the aliens?

[foodbin]

No, not just because of them.

[How to explain this?]

If you had horrible memories of a world, stuff that kept you up every night, would you want to go back and be reminded of it every place you went?

[cyclists]

...it's a little different for me, Emma. [He gets what answer he should give, but...] It would depend what would happen to the world and to other people if I didn't go back.

[foodbin]

That's part of it. I wouldn't leave it alone if it meant everyone else was shit out of luck, I just... I want to find a way to fix it and then never think of it again.

[She shakes her head.]

I don't want to remember anything that happened there. I just want it to be over.

[cyclists]

Yeah, I get that. [And he does sympathize, but it allows him to think something else over.] ..which do you really think is better though? Living with false memories of something else to replace the bad things, or knowing who you were that got you to the point it was all over?

[foodbin]

...When I said forgetting, I wasn't talking about amnesia. I just want to stop being afraid, at least a little. I want to stop thinking about it every second.

[...]

Is that enough clarification for the first point?

[cyclists]

Almost. [Almost?] If you didn't return home, where would you go instead? Does that part matter, or is it just somewhere not there?

[...] Not being afraid makes sense though, yeah. Are you afraid here, too?

[foodbin]

...I don't know. I don't know how this is all going to work out, but if the two of you are right and the universe is going to reward all of our hard work, I just want a way to make sure everyone in my world is safe, and then never see it again.

[She pauses.]

Of course I am. I don't want to be overdramatic, but... I think the stakes for me are higher for most other people.

[cyclists]

I can't really afford this to go badly, so...we're going to work together and get an answer and make sure the universe goes right to help all of us. I don't think it's such a bad thing to want to fix things and then go somewhere else. I've done that a lot.

[...] What makes you say that?

[foodbin]

I mean... Even if they don't try hard enough to get a great reward, most people here would be fine, right? They'd go back home and just do whatever they were doing last. Maybe it would be more convenient or easier for them if they had something in return, but as long as we made sure the universe was okay, they'd be fine.

...That isn't the case with me. If I don't work hard enough to get a reward that could change what happened where I'm from, the entire human race is doomed.

[cyclists]

...are you still alive back home? [It's an innocent question but that explains the gravity of the situation.] You're right in the sense of most worlds being frozen and allowing people a chance to return unharmed. But there are others like you that have to go back with very specific circumstances.

[foodbin]

[After a few moments, in response to his question:]

No. I'm not.

[cyclists]

...oh. [YEAH. OH. Okay, so, yikes?] A reward then would be to go backwards...or find a way to revive and save humanity. That's ultimately what you're after, right?

[foodbin]

...There wasn't a cure. I thought I knew how to stop them, but it didn't work. If I could find something that could save them all - I would do anything for that. No matter what it took.

[cyclists]

Even if it was still at the risk of yourself? [It's a mean question, almost, considering what she just told him but he's serious about that.] That's a lot of people relying on a way to be saved.

[foodbin]

...Yes.

[Even with the slight hesitation, it sounds honest and sincere, achingly so.]

[cyclists]

...a lot of people wouldn't feel that way. [It's admirable, actually.]

...so explain to me why you think Naminé deserves someone different. [It's a nice little segue.]

[foodbin]

...We were supposed to save the world. I had an idea, he was going to do it. But it didn’t work, and now - I think things must have been frozen before it kept going, but it’s on the way to wipe out the rest of humanity.

[...]

If my plan allowed that to happen, how am I supposed to protect one person?

[cyclists]

Was the plan failing really your fault, or are you just saying that because it was your plan?